4/7/12

Pagan Blog Project: G - Goddess Centered Life Goals

I'm going to type up two 'G' entries tonight. To my readers, I apologize that I forgot to post on this last week. I've been running in circles trying to keep up with the kids. I must first make a confession before I proceed to write upon this topic. I am not very good at keeping focus upon the Goddess. I've had many traumatic experiences revolving around maternal influences that make it very challenging for me to engage the Goddess on a deep level. Please forgive if any of this sounds awkward. I am foraging ahead on some new (to me) ground here.

It may be a mouthful but 'Goddess Centered Life Goals' is actually a new focus of mine. In some ways it is a return to a previous position with deeper self knowledge. When I was a neophyte, I was exceptionally starry eyed about the idea of a deity that had some kind of resemblance to myself. As I moved from soft polytheism into harder polytheism, I moved away from the Great Goddess of Wicca and into more focused relationships with specific deities. I'm not saying that one was better then the other, it was just what happened.

After Samhain last year, I realized that I needed to built up my relationship with the Great Goddess. It was then that I sat down and looked at some of my life goals. How can these life goals be viewed in the context of my relationship with the Goddess? It was a question that felt strange and uncomfortable. I kept asking myself until I began to sense I had some kind of an answer. (Relentless self-examination is always part of the key to personal gnosis, in my opinion.)

I looked at myself and where I stand in this journey called my life. I saw that my faith played a very large role. I saw that my life as a mother was extremely important. My life as a wife and helpmate was extremely important. And it suddenly occurred to me, this is part of how the Great Goddess manifests. It was profound in its simplicity.

Then I went back to the myths that formed the framework of the Wiccan relationship with the Great Goddess. I studied them and looked at my life. I asked myself, how can I understand my life in terms of the mythology of the Great Goddess? I asked, what is the way that the Great Goddess has manifested in me?

I'll be honest, I don't have answers to those questions. I'm still doing research and engaged in contemplation on the matter. I think, however, that as I consider my relationship with the Great Goddess it will be come clear to me just how I am one of her faces. And I think that it will not only manifest itself in my life goals but in my relationships. And I think that it will be incredibly empowering when it happens.

Until then, however, I'll do as the Buddhist monk: chop wood and carry water.

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