I am entirely at a loss for what I should write at the moment. I've been indirectly watching the train wreck of politics going on all around me on the eve of primary day. Honestly, I am a bit nervous as to how all of this is going to shake out. The status quo is grinding things down into a massive mess. The proponents for change come in some very wild varieties with their own set of individual problems. And I feel like somebody is playing fast and loose with things because instead of a full day open for voting, it is from noon until nine pm. It stinks like something isn't right and I am pretty much powerless to do anything about it.
I want to see change. The way things are going right now isn't sustainable and it looks like bigger problems are awaiting on the horizon, regardless of how we end this election year. I try not to be anxious over stuff like this. You know that I have a laundry list of stuff that I get anxious over already, taking the political mess out of the picture. I am trying to take a pragmatic approach towards everything but I have a rather powerful sense of foreboding right now. I'm not sure if it is because of my apprehension about the political shenanigans in my country or of it is because of the mounting pile of evidence that humanity has really fucked over the planet.
I don't know how to make the changes that are going to be good for myself and my family happen. We're doing ok right now. I have relatively few complaints. But, as I look forward, I can't help but be concerned that if life goes sideways, we're going to have a tough row to hoe. And, honestly, I worry about how to handle my mental health problems. I feel like I'm not doing as well as I should be. I just can't identify what I can change to get myself to a place of greater health and wellness, though. It is probably going to take a great deal of thought and such. Breakthroughs almost always are like that.
I am frustrated with things. I guess that is the biggest challenge right now. I know that you have a talent for turning frustration into useful effort. I am working on emulating this. I think it is probably better for me to put that energy to work rather than self immolating via stress.