Cursing jar. (Not to be confused with swear jar)

Because of this stupid cold and the kinda busy/chaotic way things have been for the last few weeks, I've lost track of the moon phase and such. We've snow on the ground and the temperature is reasonable for the season, I guess.

I made something today. Rather than just writing it down in my notebook, I decided to post it here in case someone actually had need of it. It's called a cursing jar/bottle. There's a bunch of different ways to make one. It is a semi-passive way to curse people. As per always, be careful casting curses because they have a way to turn back on you if you're not lucky or prepared.

Ingredients:

1 small jar or bottle with stopper
Small quantity of black pepper (in the peppercorn variety)
Small quantity of thorns
Ground red pepper (the spicy kind) or dried pequin peppers
Small quantity of salt
One steel nail (if rusty it is more effective)
Vinegar (if you want to be 'traditional', use urine)
Candle for sealing jar shut

Process:

First clean your jar or bottle completely. Let it dry. Add enough black pepper to cover the base of the jar. Add enough thorns to cover the peppercorns. Add your ground red pepper to layer over the thorns. Add the salt to cover the red pepper. Drop in your nail. Fill with vinegar. Close your jar and seal shut with enough wax so that no liquid will leak out when you shake the jar.

To use, have a target in mind and a paper representation of them. Could be a sigil just for them. It could be a picture or their name written down. Shake the jar to activate it. Pronounce your curse upon the target and place the cursing jar on the representation of your target. Leave the jar on the representation for as long as you want the curse to be active. To remove the curse, take the jar off of the image and state "My will is done. I'm through with this, begone [name]." This acts to mark the end of the curse and to send the target of the curse away from you. If you can muster up spite in your words as you pronounce the end of the curse, the farther away your target will be pushed from your sphere of influence.

Now, why did I use these ingredients?

Black pepper is an irritant. Thorns cause pain and injury. Red chili pepper is a major irritant (the stuff that makes the peppers spicy in red chili peppers is used to make bear spray). The salt is to bind the target and causes pain when rubbed into injuries. The steel nail is obvious, I hope. If not, just think of how it would feel to step on one. The vinegar is another irritant. And sealing the jar shut is just a practical measure to keep things from making a mess all over the place when you shake the jar.

If you're familiar with the 'hot foot' curse, you'll recognize that most of what I put in here is similar to that curse's jar component. It works a lot like the 'hot foot' curse. It causes irritation, suffering, and pain to the target as long as the curse is activated. It is possible to add more potency to the curse by repeating the curse and shaking the jar daily.

Snow & Ice & A curse or two.

Waning Gibbous Worm Moon (Age: X days)

Sign: Scorpio

Weather: Cold, blowing snow

(Winter Storm Stella)

Drought status: N/A

Snow pack: ~ 8 in (haven't measured, can't find ruler)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Back last month on the 24th, if I recall it correctly, there was a considerable effort put forth by many to curse that selfish monster in the Presidency. As much as I wanted to participate, life got in the way. It was the time of the last waning phase of the moon before the new moon. It is considered a prime time for casting spells of a 'darker' nature. It is also considered a good time for planting stuff that grows underground and for cutting hair. That, however, is beside the point of my post here.

I was trying to figure out what sort of spell was going to be most effective in bringing that man bad luck. While I was busy asking deities to mess with him, and giving them things in return for this, I cogitated on the matter. I was really stumped until this storm hit. And then it struck me just what to do. This spell is in two parts. The first part is a binding that is a bit different from what I usually do. The second part is a more ... traditional curse.

The binding requires a few things. A black candle, a facial hair from a woman (beard preferably), sand, and salt are what you need for this. Now, there is one element that you can't exactly pick up and place. The breath of a fish is something that sounds nonsensical. If you have a betta fish, as I do, you have access to all the little bubbles they blow when they get bored and decide to entertain themselves. What I did was I clipped one of the facial hairs off my chin and then used it to pop one of those little bubbles. Thus, it got a tiny bit of that fish breath on it. I then put that hair, a few grains of sand, and a few grains of salt on the candle. The sand and salt are both base elements in much of the landscape in my region. If I had powdered shale, I would have used that. But, if you can find out what the bedrock of your region is, go with that. That is the 'roots of the mountains' for this spell.

Anyone with a passing familiarity with Norse mythology will recognize the items I have gathered as what was used by the dwarves, amongst other items, to make the binding known as Gleipnir (the open one) that was used to bind Fenris. I made a point of not acquiring something like all of the items because it makes this harder to work. I haven't access to a cat, a bird's nest, or the remains of a bear. If I did and I was able to manage to some how capture the essence of a cat's footfall, bird saliva, and bear sinew, I would have made the attempt with it. Even though I haven't the full list of what was used for Gleipnir, what I have is still 'impossible' enough to make something that defies the efforts of those opposing me. So, I applied my spell elements to the black candle of binding with the intention that they are drawn into the flame and spun into a binding that will render the man, his right hand, and their supporters as ineffective in their tasks as Fenris is in causing mischief.

I am not putting my hand in this wolf's mouth. It has already done its best to consume me before I had declared it to be an enemy of my wellness and my people. This is something that they owe me for their deeds. This binding is but the first part of payment they are going to make on the things they have wrought against us. And, as the moon is not completely waning or new, I draw in some of the power of the full moon to push this forward. I am going to burn the candle completely and then the ashes will be disposed of in a manner that they can not contaminate anything due to their connection to that man. Some may ask, my use of my own hair in this spell, does it not draw that contamination to myself as well. I answer to this question, this is why I am going to be doing a full cleansing on all levels later and why I waited until such a cleansing was necessary. What I am sending of myself behind this spell is the miasma that has collected to me, the essence of my suffering, the various elements of despair and grief that have struck me. It is an act of sending a fetch made of my misery after them. Not something done lightly, but it serves multiple purposes. (No, I'm not going to go over all of them. And, to any who suspect it, yes, this was something advised by the All Father and the Vanadis.)

The sending of this element of myself after them is the concluding part of the binding and the beginning of the curse. I am going to reach out into the psychic energies within this storm and into all of the pain and misery that it has caused. I am going to grasp hold of the great toll of loss that this storm carries with it and channel it along the path that the fetch has gone. I am going to send the essence of snow and ice to blind their eyes so they may not see to do yet more evil. I am going to send the essence of bitter cold to choke their breath and slow their hands so that they have not the strength to engage in yet more evil. And I am going to send all aspects of ruin to them to destroy what they are attempting to build and rip apart the things they are engaged in to destroy the good of the nation.

One may ask, what sort of price goes along with this sort of thing. Well, there's two different ones to be paid here. One is actually to the storm jotuns who move through these storms to direct their attention and efforts towards these people in particular. (It is one that I negotiated with them. If you are going to do such a thing, you are going to have to negotiate your own price with them. Or with whatever elemental being or deity it is that your practice sees working with storms.) The other price that I pay is to the Lady of the Dead, Hela herself. Because in turning all of this baneful work on these people, it may go so far as to include the demise of them in the most literal of senses. So, I have asked for her direct aid in this. This was something else I had to negotiate directly with her.

There are some others, I am sure, that would also take interested in such work. As I am engaged in this under the direction of the All Father and the Lady, I know that their assistance is already in play. I have paid the dues for it by doing this work. (I also have additional work to do for them. As I mentioned earlier, this is outside of the scope of this post so I won't discuss it here.)

But, here's an idea for something that may work for you. If there is no storm raging that you can reach into and draw magic from, I know that you are all a resourceful lot and can find other ways to tap into primal energies.

On 'black magic'

Waning Wolf Moon (Age 23 days)

Sign: Sagittarius

Weather: Unseasonably warm, foggy

winter storm due in the next 48 hrs

Drought Status: D 0 - Unusually Dry

Snow Pack: melted

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Here's some copy-pasta from a discussion thread I was involved in on Facebook. I will apologize, I am that annoying person who won't proofread their FB posts and will not capitalize aside from proper names.

magic is like a hammer. a hammer is morally neutral. it can be used to build a house, fashion toys for children, or help re-break a badly set bone so it can heal properly. it can also be used to break the windshield on some one's car, injure animals, and to murder someone. the question is how are you using it and what is your intent. because, that breaking the windshield on the car may be opening it so you can pull someone out before the cat catches fire, the animal may be livestock that is getting humanely killed so that someone may eat, and the person killed may be done so in self defense.

do i do things that are considered by the mainstream pagan community as 'dark' or 'left-hand path'? yes, and i wouldn't hesitate to do so again. i use my proverbial hammer judiciously and as i deem appopriate for the situation. because magic has such a strong potential to go awry if things are not executed properly, it is not my first choice in resolving situations. i hold it in reserve until things have reached a point where i have little other recourse. curses are not something to be undertaken lightly. (by the way the really popular healing spells to make cancer go away or for your viral illness go away are technically structured as curses. and blessings can be just as damaging and horrific, if not more so. look at that old 'interesting times' one for a good example.)

there are times, however, where i had to use a curse. if you are careful and deliberate about how you structure it and the methodology you use to enact it, that 3x blow back thing is less of a concern. it is important to remember in what ever form of spell craft you engage in that you are going to be working with or against laws of physics and such. thus, to make a spell effective, you must over come the inertia of the situation (commonly referred to as 'raising energy') and you must be prepared to handle the reciprocal effects in your direction from what you initiate (all actions have an equal and opposite reaction unless acted upon by an outside force).

addendum: the 3x return thing is in most cases not a literal i do something nice for someone and somethign amazing happens for me. the incidences i have observed of things coming back with interest i can count on one hand and i've been practicing magic in some shape for over thirty years now. it is more like pushing on a pendulum. it will swing back with force equal to what you put into it. a lot of people don't realize, however, just the amount of force they put behind that push.

How to create a basic talisman.

Waxing Harvest Moon (Age: 9 days)

Sign: Capricorn

Weather: Seasonable, fair skies

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Items required:

• small object that can be carried on one's person or worn
• blessed salt water
• lit stick of incense

Ritual:

1. Hold object in the hand which is used to project energy (most frequently the dominant hand).
2. Envision the object filling with energy focused upon the purpose of the talisman.
3. When object feels 'full' pass it through the incense smoke, sprinkle with salt water, and recite incantation.
4. Carry or wear object regularly in order to use. If you feel it is losing effectiveness, cleanse the object and repeat the ritual.

Incantation:

This [name of object] is blessed with [purpose] energy. It is full and powerful. Let this power be fixed by fire and air. Let this power be fixed by water and earth. As I will, so shall it be.

Notes: 

Incantation can be adapted to different purposes. Keep the lines from "It is full ..." onward. Can include appeal for deities to bless object.

Spell to Ward off Ill Wishes

Waxing Harvest Moon (Age: 6 days)

Sign: Sagittarius

Weather: Fair skies, seasonable temps

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

This spell is a simple one. With only five steps, it is a good one for beginners and experienced practitioners alike. I have found this to be useful to keep the malefic magic of others out of my home. It can also be repeated and used in a work environment, simply keep the jar on your desk. If you are using this spell in a location where others might be inquisitive about it, you may want to use a jar with opaque glass or colored glass. This way it looks to be more of a decorative object than something just sitting with no apparent purpose.

Items Needed:

• 1 small glass jar with lid
• 10 to 20 slips of paper
• Crumpled scraps of paper that will fill the jar
• Red inked pen
• Sealing wax

Ritual:

1. Select one slip and write your name on it. On remaining slips, write gibberish. Fold all slips.
2. Fill jar with slips of paper and crumpled paper at random intervals. Use first intonation as completing this step.
3. Draw an eye on the inside of the lid. Use second intonation while completing this step.
4. Close jar and seal with wax. Use final intonation for this step.
5. Place sealed jar at entrance into dwelling, where it may be visible. 

Intonations:

1. Many slips of paper lie. Many scraps between. Never shall you find me with your baleful eye.
2. Watchful gods and spirits turn away the evil eye.
3. Safety and goodness sealed within, let my magic's might begin. 

Defensive confusion counter spell No. 1

Last Quarter Blue Moon (Age: 22 days)

Sign: Taurus

Weather: Cool, partly cloudy,

light breeze out of the west

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

This is a spell to use as a counter spell to someone ill wishing you or actually attempting to curse you. I have had fairly regular success with this one. It is an adapted version of a spell that I found in a D.J. Conway book. I have long forgotten what the book was and her title for the spell. I know that my version can be used with more or less candles, compared to the fixed number that she had.

Items needed:

• mirrored candle plate
• 6+ identical candles (Ideally enough to fit on the plate and fill it, I usually use tea lights.)
• Source of open flame (a lighter is a fine option for this)
• blessing oil or a bit of your personal scent (ie perfume or cologne)

Ritual:

1.  Create ritual space in the typical fashion for your practice. Invoke any spiritual allies that you require and make proper greetings and request for aid.
2. Pick one candle to represent you. Anoint it with the oil (also known as 'dressing' the candle) and attune it with yourself via projecting your personal spiritual energy into the candle.
3. Place your candle in the center of the candle plate. Arrange others around it.
4. Light central candle first.
5. Light other candles randomly.
6. Rearrange all the candles randomly whilst stating incantation.
7. Allow candles to burn completely.
8. Close ritual space and conclude your business with spiritual allies in manner that is customary.
9. Dispose of the candles remains in a manner that is ecologically sound.

Incantation:

6 (or however many candles in total) fires burn, one is me. Flames dance and flicker. Mirror reflects all you see but you can not tell which is me.

Notes:
The objective of this spell is to confuse the person targeting you for a spell. The candles act as illusions of yourself, which is represented by the dressed candle. Lighting them randomly and rearranging them randomly compounds the confusion in the caster because they can not tell which one is the source and which is the illusion. The mirror doubles this effect, adding an equal number of illusions plus one to the set.

Curse No. 2 - Driven on the Wind

Last Quarter Buck Moon (Age: 22 Days)

Sign: Aries

Weather: Cool, cloudy, moderate breeze

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Items needed:

Paper, writing implement, source of flame, flame proof container or location to burn items (all optional)

Conditions required:

Stormy or very windy weather makes for highest success

Write the target of the spell on the piece of paper. Place it in the vessel for burning. Light it and allow paper to burn to ashes. Cast ashes in the air to be blow away by the wind whilst stating incantation. Spell can also be cast with out ashes. Ashes can make for more effective visualization for spell but otherwise do not impact the spell greatly.

Incantation:

May you be driven on the wind.

May you find no rest or safety but ever in flight of terror.

May your voice be lost in the roar of the storm, devoid of power before that which opposes you.

May your strength be swept away as dust before the storm, powerless to resist it.

May your plans be broken as the trees before the hurricane's might.

May they be left in ruins and scattered with no hope of repair or continuance.

May your place of sanctuary be shattered as the house before the tornado's wrath.

May every board, block, and beam be broken.

May the nails be turned against you by the storm and driven into your flesh.

May you be cast away as the clouds before the wind, dissolving into nothingness on the gust.

By the restless air, I curse you, Daesh, to be destroyed and rendered powerless.

Disclaimer:

This spell can be adapted for other purposes. The caster, in doing so, assumes all karmic responsibility for their actions.

Curse No. 1 - Withering roots.

Waning Gibbous Buck Moon (Age: 16 days)

Sign: Aquarius

Weather: Seasonable, partly cloudy skies

~*~*~*~*~*~

For this spell, you will need a black candle that will burn quickly. I used a black birthday candle. Present the candle to the deities and beings whom you are seeking assistance from. As you place it in the burner, envision the target of the spell as a tree with roots running into the earth. Light the candle with an active flame (a lighter flame, another candle, or a fire).

When you light it recite the following:

Let Daesh diminish as this candle does. 

Let the elements of the world consume them as the flame consumes the candle.

Let the speed of this candle's destruction mirror the rapid destruction of Daesh.

Turn to ashes as the fires of justice consume you.

Let the tree wither from the roots up. 

Let no blossom or fruit be upon its boughs.

Let the leaves turn to dust and the tree starve for want of supplies.

Burn away. You turn to ashes and dust. Powerless before the wind and ground beneath the heel of those who stand against you. You turn to naught. Just as the candle is consumed and vanishes, so shall you be consumed by justice's flame and vanish into nothingness, where none will remember your name.

As you recite the curse, envision the tree withering from the roots up. Envision the leaves becoming brittle and crumbling to dust. See all bud of future growth or fruit turning hard and then crumbling to dust. See the tree consumed from a flame that rises up from the earth, turning it to a pile of dust and ash. And then watch as the wind scatters the remains to the four corners of the world.

When the candle is fully consumed, the curse becomes 'active'. If there are any trace amounts of the candle left, melt them and then pour them into a container that is to be destroyed (ie: a paper milk jug that can be burned or recycled). Destroy the container, ensuring that the full potency of the spell is released. (Disposing of the container in recycling that is going to be processed at a plant counts as destroying the components.)

Then cleanse your ritual location and focus upon returning everything to the neutral energy it had before your action. Also, make a point to cleanse yourself of the energies associated with the curse. It is miasmic and will cause all sorts of its own special issues.

DISCLAIMER: If you are going to be cursing someone, expect there to be some sort of metaphysical push back. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Be prepared for some type of magical manifestation in your own life. This may or may not be harmful. Results will vary upon that front. The format of this spell is such that it can be adapted to other purposes. The use of this spell can have negative consequences if the target is 'close' to you. I recommend a different approach to interpersonal problems. All karmic repercussions of this spell is upon the user.

Palmyra, Daesh, and Disappointment.

Waxing Buck Moon (Age: 5 days)

Sign: Virgo

Weather: Partly cloudy, humid, warm

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In case you haven't read it in the news, Daesh (the group known as ISIS or ISIL, though I refuse to call it anything other then Daesh) has laid mines around the ancient ruins of the city of Palmyra. It has been described as holding this world heritage site hostage. A description that, honestly, I agree with. I fear that the Syrian government will not be successful in recapturing the city of Palmyra and that Daesh will destroy this important site. I try not to think about those fears because brooding upon them feeds them more energy and may help this terrible possibility manifest. I confess, however, I am fearful of what Daesh will do.

I have read of what evil people have used magically to bolster themselves and I have no illusions that Daesh is employing some form of magic towards their ends. Seeing what they have done over the last year, I am deeply troubled by what they are engaged in. Daesh is reshaping the landscape of the Middle East in blood to something that only in mouthed words resembles Islam. They are persecuting, torturing, and murdering people who come across their path who do not ascribe to their vision. They are destroying ancient sites that are vital to the history of the region (and the world) because of their objection to the ancient faiths that were practiced there but they are selling off artifacts to fund their campaign of terror. I look at Daesh and I am horrified by what they are, what they have wrought, and what their apparent vision of the future is. 

I look at this extremism and I fear for the people that live under that rule and those who are caught within its grasp. When I look to the United States and I see the growing attitudes of Christian extremism, I feel deep disgust and disappointment. When I see the systemic racism in my homeland being justified as 'biblicaly sound' attitudes, my disappointment deepens. Do I believe the extremists in the US are going to be as violent as Daesh? I don't think that will be an immediate thing but if they gain traction, they will become so. 

I pray for these people to be halted in their efforts to oppress others. I pray that their views will not gain adherents. I pray for justice to be done for all whom these people have harmed. But, sometimes, I feel that my prayers are not enough. When the shooting in Charleston happened, I was not surprised to learn of the gunman's philosophical leanings. It is but another manifestation of the same extremists who bomb Planned Parenthood and similar 'abortion' clinics. It is but another manifestation of the same extremists who think murdering gay and transgender people is a proper thing to do. When these evils are enacted, I feel powerless to do anything about them.

I will confess, I have something of a soft heart. When I read of these tragedies, I grieve for all who are afflicted by them. I despair for the future. And then I pray for justice and healing. I have been feeling of late that my prayers are not enough in the face of this evil. Odin has been strongly encouraging me to apply magic to the problems. Indeed, one of the ways he has been encouraging me to apply magical effort is by way of curses. I was feeling rather squicked by the concept of throwing curses around up until recently.

Perhaps my discomfort with curses came from the 'lightworker' heritage that I bear in my training. Or perhaps it comes from my fears that engaging in such things will bring disaster upon my house (as I had been told in the past by someone that I then respected). I realized, however, as I read of the Charleston massacre, the murder of several young trans-people, and Daesh's latest actions in Palmyra, that my discomfort is something of an attempt to avoid stepping up to oppose what feels like an overwhelming opposition. This is something that is unacceptable. 

So, over the next month, I will be working on spells to hinder and neutralize these evil people. My discomfort must not stop me from acting because it is wrong for me not to do something when I have the capacity to lend even a small bit of effort towards stopping this evil. As I work up these spells, I will post the 'recipes' on here. It is my hope that some of my readers who are comfortable (morally) with taking these actions will join me in doing so. I will be continuing my prayers for justice to be had for the victims and for their healing.

I may be but one person, but I can pray and cast spells with the best of 'em. Aside from this, I can continue to take a stance in my dealings with others that opposes these evils when they come to light.

The matter of ISIL

New Flower Moon (Age: 0 days)

Sign: Taurus

Weather: Warm, fair skies

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was with great deliberation and much consultation with my Dísir that I came to the conclusion that it was appropriate to curse ISIL. They had added on another focus but I am not to speak of it until the full moon. Yesterday, I performed the curse on ISIL and I did so under the guidance of my Dísir. This really was the first time I have done magic with the active participation of the Dísir. I honestly have no idea how this will effect the manifestation of the spell's results.

They told me to do the exact opposite of my usual curse breaking spell. My usual curse breaking spell consists of taking three thorns, grinding them to a powder, and burning them. As I do so, I focus on the malevolent magic and energies that have been directed at someone and drive them down into the earth to dissipate. It sometimes is harder to do when I haven't much invested personally in the outcome of the spell. I think that is because I do my most effective magic when my heart is entwined with it.

 

The curse on ISIL was assembled in the physical realm by taking three thorns and driving them into a candle at varying intervals. As I lit the candle, I declared what the results of the curse would be and the target. I then allowed the candle to burn completely. It was interesting because as the candle burned, it cracked apart where the thorns pierced it. Also, the candle continued to burn for a little while when the wax about the wick was used up. I am more then a little bit certain that last bit was the hands of the Dísir. 

 

Unlike other spells I have done recently, I did not feel a great flow of power from myself into the flame. In this instance, I saw the flame drawing energy to it and then that energy was sent elsewhere. I also had the distinct impression that there were more deities then Loki, Freya, Odin, and Tyr observing (if not influencing) this. When the candle had burned down and extinguished itself, I disposed of all the remnants, taking care not to touch the components. I had the candle set in a 'bowl' made of aluminum foil. I did this because I didn't want to have the trouble of cleaning wax out of a candle holder. When I realized that the action also preserved me from handling the miasmic leavings of the spell, I immediately wondered if I had been guided to do so by the gods. 

While ISIL is causing havoc in the middle east, I've noticed that all of the old gods have sat up and taken notice (with more then a little displeasure). They've also been taking note of the other group that I was directed to include as a focus. I did a separate ritual for that. This second ritual has a longer time frame then the first. I think this means that the first will manifest more quickly. I feel that something is moving beneath the surface and the spells I have done this phase of the moon are going to have some far reaching consequences.

I was careful to manufacture the spells so that the blow back was as carefully directed as the spells themselves. I know that sending energy out means that energy returns to you. The curse that I sent out was crafted in such a fashion that the energy that returns will be something that removes harmful things from my life. Oddly enough, it was Freya's direct guidance that engineered that. I did a lot of the heavy lifting whilst she gave directions.

I haven't done divination on what the results of this will be. I am not going to either. I will just let it be as it is and let the plethora of gods deal with it. I have more immediate concerns to deal with right now. And perseverating on how the spell will manifest is only going to make me stressed out. ISIL and the others have kicked a hornets' nest. My actions merely funnel the direction of the hornets on to them. And that was all I, honestly, was willing to do.

Could I have gone farther with it? Yes. But I didn't think it was worth the fall out from doing so. And neither did my Dísir. And when all else fails, it's good to listen to the ancestors because they usually have a perspective that you don't on such things as magic.

The Goddess is Love

We are one with the Lady, we are one with the Lord;
We are one with the Lady, we are one with the Lord;
And we know that earth's balance will one day be restored,
And they'll know we are witches by our love, by our love,
And they'll know we are witches by our love.

We will walk with each other, we will walk hand in hand,
We will walk with each other, we will walk hand in hand,
And together we'll spread the news the Goddess is in our land,
And they'll know we are witches by our love, by our love,
And they'll know we are witches by our love.

All praise to the Lady from whom all things come,
And all praise to the Horned Lord who makes us one,
And all praise to the people for joy and creation,
And they'll know we are witches by our love, by our love,
And they'll know we are witches by our love.

~ Anon. (adapted from They Know We Are Christians)

This little chant has been rattling in my mind for a few days now. It has been a gentle refrain as I struggle with my own challenges and individual problems. I find myself struggling with major self-image and self-worth issues. As Beloved pointed out to me, my problems are no less legitimate then his. He calmly and quite completely explained that my psychological difficulties are as in need of treatment as a physical one. Then he reminded me that I was worthy of healing, being loved, and of being successful. It brought me to tears.

This morning, as I lit my spell candle, it again struck me that the Goddess is love. She is more then that romantic rosy feeling that throws us topsy-turvy. She is the deep, abiding and compassionate love that is unconditional and sustaining. She is loving with out regard for how worthy a person feels they are or the opinions that others have of them. Unconditional love simply loves a person because they are there to be loved.

I've been struggling with cultivating that type of love for myself. And the faint refrain "we are love, love, love." just keeps echoing. I started this spell a little over a week ago. It is simply focused upon cultivating the love that I need in my life to be genuine to who and what I am. I now wear about my wrist a band with a charm in the shape of one of the ancient votive offerings to the Earth Goddess with the addition of a tiny heart.

I keep repeating my prayer that I started out with at the beginning of this whole process almost four years ago: Let me be healthy in body, mind, and soul. Taking the time to align myself with the Goddess in her face as Love, I think ... I think it will heal me as much as my vigorous efforts with exercise and diet have dramatically increased my physical health.

Contemplations and a compilation

Waning Strawberry Moon (18 days old)
Moon Sign: Aquarius
Weather: Mildly humid, seasonably warm, fair skies with light haze
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I have been busy with my garden and my children recently. The strawberry plants are getting berries on them. My oregano is growing like crazy and the new pot of thyme that my MiL got me is doing so too. I keep checking on my tomatoes and my pepper plant. I get nervous that they're going to be attacked by aphids or something. Every day, just about, I have been out among my plants. If I'm not watering them, then I'm pulling weeds or just checking them over to make sure they're in good health.

They're like another set of children, to be honest. Speaking of children, my boys are growing as fast as the plants. My eldest is in preschool and they asked me if there were any special family traditions or religious observances I wanted them to keep in mind. I was thrown for an absolute loop when they asked me that. I honestly don't know how to answer that question. A part of me says that it would be wrong to bring up our religion even as another part of me says this is a perfect opportunity to educate the general public about witchcraft.

To say the least, I've been giving it a lot of thought and prayer. I may even do some divination on this matter and talk to a few other witches. At the moment, I think I would have really loved to have Stargazer's and Rose's thoughts on this topic. They, however, are not about me at the moment but elsewhere on the Otherside. You can't exactly pick up the phone and leave a voice mail for the dead to call you back. It generally doesn't seem to work like that. They come and go as they do and on their own sense of time.

And then there is the other things I have been busy with. I've been writing articles about various facets of Wicca for the novice witch. My goal is to take the knowledge that I've learned and put it out in easily understood bites this way the young witches and seekers out there have at least one good source of information. Below is what I have done so far.

Wicca 101
Ancient Myths & Modern Man

• Part 1
• Part 2
• Part3

Spiritual Self-Defense & Protection

• Part 1
• Part 2
• Part 3
• Part 4

Wicca 201
Divination

As I write more articles, I'll post links to them on here.

Stitches and witches, sew what?

Moon Phase: Waxing Blossom Moon (4 day old)
Moon Sign: Gemini
Weather: Seasonably mild, clear skies and light breezes from the west. Venus is quite brilliant.

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My silly attempts at punning aside, I have spent my time since my last post here engaged in a great deal of spinning, sewing, embroidery, knitting, and crochet. This is not idle behavior but rather closely tied to my efforts to regain my psychological and spiritual health. It may sound a little silly, but I am in effect adopting some of the idea of the Prayer Shawl Ministry into one of my projects.

J & J are two very dear friends of mine who have fallen onto hard times. The husband of this sweet couple (who are like family to my husband and I, the proverbial 'brother from another mother' kind of deal here) has had the misfortune to be in prison because of an unjust law and will remain there until 2013, unless the Gods are kind and some act has him released into his wife's loving arms and liberty before then, healthy and hale. As they struggle to achieve some level of normalcy in this situation and do their best to retain their dignity in what is a truly degrading and dehumanizing situation (an innocent man sent to prison is just terrible for all involved), I was at a loss for what to do to bring a measure of help and comfort to the wife of this couple. They had told us various things we could do, but it really felt paltry in the face of the enormity of this tragedy.

Then I remembered reading about the Prayer Shawl Ministry as I was looking up shawl patterns to make for myself. Instead of a shawl, however, I am making a blanket which they both can share. As I work on this blanket, it is not simply that the blanket itself is going to be stitched with love, compassion, and good wishes for them. For this blanket is being made from hand-spun yarn from myself and those who spin and are willing to donate. The yarn I have made, it is special because into the yarn itself is spun my intentions to express the love, support, and good wishes of my family for these two very dear people in our lives. It may be simplistic but sometimes, it is the simplest forms of magic that work the best.

My newest embroidery project is a sampler done in colors inspired by myself with stitches chosen as they occur to me. It is something of a self-portrait in fabric. It is not a very large sampler, but I am intending to do another and another as I progress forward in my counseling. While my painting has reflected the pain and sorrow of the past, my embroidery has shown the radiant core of joy, peace, and love that has always been within me, undaunted by the afflictions that I have experienced. I haven't yet decided on the motto I'm going to stitch on to this. I am debating between Love Conquers All (in Latin or English, I'm not fully committed yet) or All acts of Love and Pleasure. I am planning on making this little sampler into either a pillow or a rose scented sachet. Either way, it is going to be one of the first things I see in the morning and one of the last I see at night. A daily reminder of my strength and the various other wonderful qualities I have within me. My intent is for this to be a love-gift to myself, for Beloved has very wisely pointed out that I haven't done enough kind things like this for myself.

Similar to the crochet blanket I mentioned earlier, I am going to be piecing and sewing a pair of quilts. It was initially going to be three quilts, but the plans for that fizzled out fairly quickly. One quilt is going to be of a modest size and I plan for it to be finished by Yule, at the latest. It is for my brother's soon-to-be ex-wife. Just as the crochet blanket I am making for J & J is going to embody the love and care that I and my family hold for them, this will do so for a woman who has become my sister in name and deed. It may no longer be in name, but she will always be a sister to me and I shall always treasure her presence in my life. This will be a sampler quilt of a very traditional design, there by I hope to not only carry forward my own bit of skills but also the heritage of my family that my brother's disgraceful behavior failed to convey to his wife and children.

The second quilt is going to be large enough for a king-sized bed and it will be what is known by some as a 'double top' or a 'double patchwork' quilt. This is specifically for our dear friend who is in prison right now. One block is going to be made for each month of his sentence. The last six months of his term are going to be for piecing together the blocks, quilting, and finishing this. It will be made with my thoughts and prayers for him. Happy memories, hopes, and everything else that comes to mind as I meditate upon him while I sew is going to be part of this. If I can, I am going to try to get Beloved to do some stitches into this also.

This is what I am working on. By doing this, I not only have tangible evidence in my hands of how I can help others, my love for them, the relationships I am in, and of who I am, I also help to sow peace and love where there is fear and anxiety. Even only a small measure of that helps the world at large.

Spring is the season of growth, if the Gods smile on me, perhaps these seeds will grow and run rampant, crowding out the depression and other things that have served to oppress me and many others. For we are all most severely in need of it.

Candle Magic for Healing

Moon: Waxing Ice Moon, sign of Taurus
Weather: Unseasonably warm, overcast, light rain and humid
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The link I have above is to a website that has done a fair amount of homework on this subject. They do a pretty good job of representing the 'standard' understanding of color associations for candle magic. I'm not going to write down the spell I used here because I have yet to write it into my Book of Shadows. Furthermore, it is more effective to make your own spell then to use one from someone else.

All of that said, I have a blue candle burning on my altar right now. It is infused with the oils of rose and chamomile. While the packaging for this candle says it is for positive energy, I'm not using it for that. The nice thing about candles in magic is that the people who sell them can suggest what you use them for but you ultimately decide how you use them. I could discuss that and ramble along on that topic for a while but that's not the objective with my post here.

I wanted to talk about healing magic and candle magic. Candle magic is something that works fairly quickly, in my opinion. If I wanted to do magic that manifest within a week or a few days, I get a candle that burns quickly and use it for this purpose. Candles that take longer to burn can equate to a longer time period until manifestation. That is, however, if you are keying your spell to the consumption of the candle. It is possible to focus the spell's manifestation on different elements of the use of the candle.

I have a big fat pillar candle on my altar. It is one that I burn when ever I am praying or meditating. It serves as a visual focus for me and as a representation of my offering to the Gods. Other candles have different purposes and my use of them reflects it. They all have the same basic function, which is to be a physical tie to what I am working to accomplish and a psychological key to help me enter the correct mindset to engage in the task I have. I like candle magic because even the act of lighting the candle helps to settle and focus me. It is a ritual all by itself.

Healing magic... Oh how much of a mixed blessing that is. On one hand, we like to think that healing magic makes us feel wonderful and somehow removes all ailments. It doesn't do that, however. Properly constructed healing magic works to help the subject reach the state that will be maximum health for them at that time. It doesn't specify that they are what is commonly understood as healthy. I've done healing magic that brought that result. I've also done healing magic that brought death. It was not my intent to bring death, but death was the healthiest state for the person to be in, for it released them from the great suffering that they were in.

Healing magic, like love magic, is a double edged sword. My blue candle is focused upon my psychological healing. Since I have put it on my altar and started burning it, it hasn't alleviated my flashbacks, night terrors, or the trembling fear that stalks my heart often these days. Instead, it has been forcing me to confront them by placing situations and events into play that serve either as a mirror or draws these buried things up into the light of my conscious mind. It is not comfortable, gentle, or anything even remotely resembling pleasant.

It is as difficult to heal as it is to be wounded. In many ways, I believe it is harder. I think this healing magic that I am working on is like calling in another pair of hands to assist me in forcing the infection out of a wound that had scabbed over. That other pair of hands won't shrink from something because it causes me discomfort. It is very, very hard to accept that magic works like this but when you do accept it, you become far more successful.

Right now, however, I look forward to when the pain eases back to more tolerable levels. I don't believe I'm going to cast anything to make this healing progress faster because these kinds of things, if they go quickly, seem to turn very, very ugly in the midst of moving rapidly before hitting that desired result.

Waxing moon, waxing challenges.

Moon phase: Gibbous waxing, one day before full
Moon sign: Pisces
Weather: Unseasonably warm, fair skies and mildly humid.
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As the moon has transitioned closer to full, I've found the challenges in my life has increased and more illumination has been shed on my weaknesses. As the month where Samhain falls is generally the month were much of the work one engages in over the year comes to completion, I recognize that this month is going to be quite challenging. I'm not exactly enjoying it, but I understand and accept it. It's easier when you accept the reality of the challenges before you then it is to try to run from them.

This said, I'm unsure what exactly I should do when it comes to engaging in magical work for this month. It's been a hard debate as to if I should actively engage in magic for my Aunt's bit of a problem. She has a love struck individual who is quite infatuated with her and her feelings for him are only friendship. It's made things somewhat uncomfortable and she's asked me to cast something to help him find someone who he will have his affections returned in the same fashion and be happy with.

Since the disasters that I've witnessed with respect to love magic, I generally try to avoid any of it. Most people are asking for one thing and wanting something entirely different. Only rarely does it work in the way that's what is desired and in those cases it is because desire and will are aligned to make it happen. I find it difficult to agree to do a spell for some one else on the matter of love because of the challenges that get additionally entangled if a third party is doing something on this front.

With every spell that one does, they will entangle themselves into it as well. I've observed over the years that, for example, if you bind someone against certain behaviors, you in turn bind yourself against them. It is a sympathetic restriction that serves to help reinforce the focus. Most people don't realize this reciprocal element of magic. It makes the question of what to cast and how to cast it become more important to any given Witch.

It also makes the question of what you're ethics say about your spell work a much larger one. I'm currently wrestling with that one right now. As I've been thinking about it, I'm tending towards casting one specific thing. Something to bring them each a healthy, loving relationship, that will support them in completing the things that they must engage in on their respective Life Paths. It would be something that can resolve the discomfort of both individuals and promotes their well-being. It also is something that I'm willing to do because it serves to reinforce what I've been working on here for myself.

Then there is the other matter that I'm struggling with. I'll write about that in a little bit, as I've a few household things to attend to. I suspect, however, there is going to be quite a few comments and thoughts murmured about in response to this next post.